I don’t want to hear today

It’s weird for a deaf person like me, but today I just don’t want to hear. It seems to live in the world of idiots. You talk and say you can’t hear well on the phone … nothing, as unspoken. They call the same.

So the voice message … which is the same thing.

I am used, in spite of myself and unfortunately, not to hear well, to no longer have hearing but a metal implant that takes its place.

And the weirdest thing is that when you say you don’t hear well, people scream!

No need to scream … or at least it doesn’t help me at all, but it’s worse, because it resounds in my head. Just speak more slowly. So I can understand.

It’s frustrating and people don’t get it that much, it’s bad for me not to hear. Sometimes I have to say he makes me laugh … that is, in the end Beethoven was also deaf before he was thirty (at least I got to forty).

Now I have to get used to this feeling in a different way, that is to perceive the sounds in a different way than before or some not perceive them at all! It takes time and patience … and I have time, a little less patience, also because sometimes people’s stupidity far exceeds my desire to explain.

Now then with a cold mind it is not true that I do not want to hear, what I would not give to hear again …

But I get used to this new condition, not by leaving myself a condition, but by conditioning myself.

Then I think about when I will be able to do the things before and then I make plans, plans (even if I said not to do any more). Then I stop and understand that I will never be the same again. I have to work for it to be the same, if not better … but how to do it?

Of course I can not count on hearing … now that has gone its way, then I have the brain. The body is not, that are twenty kg more and I do not know if I will be able to get back in shape.

Well… so it’s all a matter of will.

But not today .. let’s rest.